A random day with two sith lords and an elf
by Master Darth Warious - Lady of Chaos
Summary: 2 Sith 1 elf and 1 force sensitive Ewok. Curious? Read and find out. Day 15 up. the last day. Complete!
1. day 1

Disclaimer: I don't own 4-H, Star Wars, LotR, or any of their characters . I do own the characters, Darth Warious, and Commander Rogue Dragon.  
  
A Random day for Darth Warious and company. By Darth Warious  
  
It was another boring 4-H science team meeting. My best friend Commander Rogue Dragon was there. Along with my Sith brother Darth Maul, and elven keeper Haldir. I brought a pad of paper originally intended for drawing, but instead was used for the following conversation.  
  
Darth W: I am bored.  
  
Darth M: So?  
  
W: Your no help 'brother'.  
  
M: You dragged me to this for what reason again?  
  
W: Your more fun to talk with if I turn evil. Elf boy here doesn't seem to appreciate our ways.  
  
CRD: What are you two talking about?  
  
W: Nothing we're bored.  
  
H: You should be paying attention.  
  
W & CRD: Shut up!  
  
(A/N: Commander doesn't like elves; I just like trying to annoy them.)  
  
CRD: Can I join in?  
  
W: You already have joined. Welcome to the Nightmare!  
  
M: Calm down Warious, the meeting only just started.  
  
W:*pouts* oh fine. Hey Maul, since we're the only people that can really see you, will you show off some of your saber skills for Commander.  
  
M: *shakes his head and moves off to a wider space* CRD: Cool!  
  
W: Yeah Darth Maul is the best!  
  
CRD: *sneakily* better than the elf?  
  
W: Yes. Way better.  
  
H: What?!? No he is not!  
  
CRD: Kyp Durron could beat Darth Maul.  
  
W: No way. Vader could beat Durron, Dooku beat Vader, and Darth Maul could have beat Dooku. Both Maul and the 'elf' have beaten me.  
  
H: And I could beat Maul if I wanted to.  
  
W: Yeah, if you could work a lightsaber. Ha ha ha. (A/N: Elves can't seem to handle lightsabers)  
  
M: Since you two are busy talking to each other I'm going to stop "demonstrating my saber skills".  
  
W: Whatever. *listens briefly to the meeting going on off paper*  
  
M: Heads up! Warlord Zsinj is here. (A/N: Read Aaron Allston's X-Wing books)  
  
CRD: Why is he here?  
  
W: I have no idea. *to Zsinj* Hey! What are you doing here? I thought I locked you in the dog crate before I left.  
  
Z: I'm not stupid like dogs are. I unlocked the door. As to why I'm here, I've come to talk to General Antilles.  
  
CRD & W: He's not here. Go Away.  
  
CRD: Too bad Zsinj. He stayed home today.  
  
W: *to CRD* he hates meetings of course he didn't show up.  
  
CRD: But he doesn't have to know that.  
  
Meanwhile Zsinj was rambling on about why I shouldn't have locked him in the dog crate. We are ignoring him.  
  
W: Blah blah blah blah blah, That's all they do in these meetings! So bored.falling into.dark side.influence. Going.bad!  
  
H: Warious behave. Remember what happened last time you did this?  
  
W:*now evil* what happened?  
  
H: *whispers something in my ear*  
  
W: *turning red* Okay not going too be evil. I don't want that to happen again.  
  
H: Drat.  
  
CRD: *looks suspicious but says nothing yet*  
  
Z: *still ranting*  
  
M: *is contemplating on how to shut Zsinj up*  
  
W: Shut up Zsinj and go away if you're not going to be helpful.  
  
Zsinj: *pouts* Fine I'll leave. Be that way! *leaves*  
  
W: What a baby! How did he ever make warlord in the first place?  
  
CRD: Bribes, lots of bribes.  
  
W: That explains it.  
  
CRD: What happened last time you went dark?  
  
W: None of your business.  
  
CRD: Come on. Tell me please?  
  
W: *turning red again* NO NO NO!  
  
CRD: *turns to Haldir* What? *glares lasers at him*  
  
H: I'm not telling.  
  
W: Hey, you just talked to him!  
  
CRD: You weren't giving me any answers.  
  
W: Hey look, the meetings ended! See ya later! *bolts to the door to escape further interrogation*  
  
*************  
  
A/N: Thanks for reading. Reviews please. If you want more daily life with two Sith and an elf please say so with your reviews. 


	2. day 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Haldir or Star Wars or Earth..Yet  
  
Day 2: First I would like to explain that I am actually a Sith lady, not a 'lord'.  
  
7:30 am. I feel the dark side flowing into me, filling me with the power of a Sith. I know it's time to get up.but I don't want to. Darth Maul, I sense, is downstairs. Zsinj is back in the dog crate, sleeping. My mind reaches out to see where that danged elf, Haldir, is. He wasn't outside, or downstairs. I directed my senses to the upper level of the two story house we all shared, where I was. Yes, he's up here alright, but why did he feel so close? My physical senses wake up and I feel someone in bed next to me. "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" I screamed when I opened my eyes. "Get out of my bed you sicko! Out! Out! Out! What in Kessel's bloody name are you doing in my room!"  
"I felt that you need closer watching at night than you do in the morning." Haldir replied lamely.  
"I don't need watching, you Peedunkee Sleemo!"  
"You have been speaking in your sleep." he said still in my bed, holding me closer, and looking me in the eye. "You call for me in your sleep. I have only answered." "You didn't do anything to me, did you?" I asked skeptically. "I didn't invade your space outside of what I am doing now." "Some Sith you are." Maul's voice said. "Our master would be disgusted if he saw you now." "Believe me, dear brother, I'm already disgusted."  
  
8:30 am Maul and I are meditating on the way of the Sith. This is some thing we do daily for an hour.  
  
9:30 am After honing our skills in the force for a half hour I leave for work at the local library. Haldir follows me. "Go away." I tell him. "No." "Leave!" "No" You are probably wondering, why I don't shoot him down with force lightning as any Sith should? The reason is Elves are not force sensitive. You can feel them but it doesn't effect them.  
  
5:00pm All I've done since 9:30 is work.and argue with Haldir about why or why not he should follow me around all day. So far I'm losing.  
  
5:45 I finally make it home. But I am still arguing with Haldir. Zsinj is out of his cage, drat. "What is He doing out of his cage!!!" Maul looks up from the holonet terminal and shrugs. Maul doesn't care about who gets locked up or not. He cares if I'm not being 'Sith' enough. "Get back in your cage!" I yell at Zsinj. "You can't make me." Zsinj replies and walks to the fridge. Ahhh. At last. A chance to use the darkside! Reaching out with the force, I dragged Zsinj away from the refrigerator and locked him back in the dog crate. Then I made dinner.  
  
7:00 pm Maul, Haldir, and I fight over what we are going to watch tonight. Maul wants to watch The Mummy. I want to watch Attack of the Clones. Haldir wants to watch himself. (Second disk of the special edition LotR movies FotR and TTT) Maul won, so we watched The Mummy.  
  
9:00 pm I head for my room, tired with all the arguing I've done today, for a nice dreamless sleep. But it was not to be. That danged elf followed me into my room again. "Why in Kessel's name do you insist on following me?" I demanded. "Why do you keep calling me in your sleep?" "I don't know. Just don't answer. Goodnight."  
  
A/N: any ideas for a weekend activity, any needed explainations? Send an e- mail to me at twolf_hawk_1832_656@yahoo.com As always, review please. 


	3. day 3

Disclaimer: like the last chapters only adding Veggie Tales (and all things associated) to the list. Still don't own Earth.yet  
  
Day 3  
  
Saturday 7:30  
  
I hate getting up in the morning, I thought to myself as I lay in bed; hoping the weight across my stomach was just a bunched up blanket. I opened one eye then shut it again and groaned; it wasn't a blanket it was an arm. "I know you are awake," the owner of the arm spoke. "Get up." "Get your arm off of me and get out of my room." I replied to my every day annoyance, Haldir. Haldir the annoying elf of Lothlórien, I thought in my mind. "Why should I?" "Because I'll. Shit I keep forgetting you elves are not affected by the force." Haldir looked smug. Then I got an idea, a wonderfully horrible awful idea. Both Maul and Haldir are sick of Veggie tales. I want to watch Veggie tales. (A/N: Hey a Sith can do anything they want, including watching Veggie tales whenever they want.) I will bide my time first. I shall start with singing. "Good morning George how are you? I hope you're feeling fine. I'd like to stay and talk but it's almost 8 o'clock and I haven't got the time" (A/N: From Rack, Shak, and Benny, for all you non veggie fans out there. *coughjedicough*) That being sung, I got out of bed after shoving the elf out, and went downstairs.  
  
8:30 Maul and I recite the code of the Sith before meditation "I am the haunter of the embracing dark. I am the bringer of fear. I am the scorner of peace and tranquility. I ride the storm cloud and the night! I seek to crush the commonplace. I seek to strike terror in every heart. I know no passion or pity. I seek to be Sith, in all its manifestations..." Then we meditate. Meditating on the darkside *deep breath and slow exhale* I love it so.  
  
I don't think Haldir likes being around us when we say the code. He always mutters something about a Morgoth, or Melkor.  
  
9:30 I grab my blaster and dual bladed lightsaber and head out side with Darth Maul for a nice session of saber practice. We take turns using the blaster and shoot at the other. This is to 1) work on our aim *for the one with the blaster*, and 2) help us to deflect well aimed blaster shots. We seem to be very lucky as no one from the government has found out about us yet. Haldir watches us from a 'safe' distance in a tree.  
  
10:00 Maul and I always practice for an hour on weekends. Unfortunately I felt like staying home and lying around doing nothing *nothing but watch Veggie Tales that is* So singing "The Pirates Who Don't do Anything" I went inside and put in Jonah. Then I proceeded to put the volume all the way up, and sing along with the songs and say all the lines in the movie. Fortunately nobody but I can drive the car, and Maul's swoop bike is in need of repairs. *Let's just say an anonymous person got hold of someone's bow and a few arrows and decided to play 'Warrior on the War Path', pretending that the swoop was a sheriff and his horse and hit the engine with an arrow. Thus causing the unnamed person to be in deep Bantha poodoo with Darth Maul and the other person who owned the bow* (co-A/N-H: If you ever do that. A/N-W: It's a story. It's not like I'm actually going to do it. *smiles innocently* co-A/N-H: *skeptical* Right.) Anyway, as I was saying, they had nowhere to go and were forced to put up my loud singing. ^_^  
  
1:30 We've had lunch and finished the movie. If you were wondering where Zsinj is, don't. I used a very heavy dose of sedative on him when I got downstairs. Now I'm just gonna veg in the woods in my backyard and sleep/meditate. Or so I thought.  
  
"Where do you think you are going?" came the voice of the obnoxious elf from behind me as I was about to open the door. "Outside. Do you have a problem with that?" "No." "Good," I replied and left the building. I got behind the house before I remembered to look behind me *elf problem*. To my relief, he didn't follow me, and I went to my favorite spot in the forest. It's strange how that this very place is where I first found Haldir. That wasn't the most pleasant of experiences for me. I sat down and lost myself to the memory.  
  
**** I was sitting on the ground, meditating, when I felt a strong disturbance in the force. I closed my eyes and focused on finding what had caused this disturbance, hoping the Jedi hadn't found this planet yet. It didn't feel like a Jedi.it felt old but strong. I continued to probe with the force. I felt it was a humanoid of some sort. I heard a rustling in the background as I continued to force probe, but paid it no mind. I followed its direction as the creature moved. It was heading towards me! I grabbed my lightsaber and stood up, only to find and arrow in my face. I regarded the 'man' in front of me. He was taller than me, and *I'm so ashamed to admit this but* was really hot. *not that I'd tell him now* Finally he spoke, "What is a woman doing alone in the forest?" he lowered his bow. "I'm not alone," I replied and tapped my lightsaber. "Who are you and what are you doing here?" "Your name first, and that stick you carry is not a companion." I ignited one end of my saber, "I asked you your name first. This 'stick' is a lightsaber and can easily cut you in two." The person before me did not look impressed. "If you must be stubborn about it," he said with a mock sigh. "I am Haldir of Lothlórien." I almost laughed, that was the name of the creepy elf that dissed Gimli, but I didn't though because he looked like he meant it. "I am Darth Warious of the Empire," I said with a mock salute. "Why do you call yourself the name of a fictional character?" "This is my real name." Haldir replied. This resulted in one of my classic moments of immaturity, until Darth Maul came and stopped me from being more stupid. ****  
  
3:30 "I thought you might be here." I growled in annoyance and replied, "I come out here to be alone. Now leave." Haldir sat down next to me. "That's not leaving," I stated looking straight ahead. "You've been out here for two hours now." "So?" I asked sounding bored. "I thought you might want to know." "How long have you been with us?" I asked Haldir. "Two and a half years. Why?" "I was just wondering." *crickets chirping* "You're still here," I stated. I saw him nod out of the corner of my eye. "Why haven't you left?" "Why should I leave?" He countered. "Because I am Pharaoh and my word is law," I retorted with mock superiority. "You are not Pharaoh." "But my word is law anyway." "Keep dreaming."  
  
5:00 We're still there in the woods on the ground. I've fallen asleep on my companion, though it was very unintentional. "Come on Warious, time to go inside," I heard a voice calling to me. I stirred. "Get up or I'm carrying you inside," the voice came again; but for some reason I could not bring myself to consciousness. *I was hearing through the force* I suddenly could see out side of my body. I saw Haldir pick me up and go inside. I followed and saw Maul come up to Haldir who was still holding my body. I felt Maul reach out to me with the force. I replied I heard Maul tell Haldir to place my body in bed and see how I was in the morning.  
  
****  
  
A/N: Can you stand the suspense? As always, review please. Thank you to the inspiration of, Elf with a lightsaber, for giving me the idea to show my love of Veggie Tales. 


	4. day 4

Same old disclaimer: But I own Darth Warious H: You own yourself? W: Shut up I'm writing.  
  
******  
  
Day 4  
  
12:00 am  
  
I'm still here, floating above my body, wondering what the Kessel happened. Haldir has been keeping watch over it ever since he put my body in bed. Maul has gone off to consult our meager resources on what happened and how to fix it. Then, about ten minutes after twelve, I heard a familiar voice calling my name.  
  
(Warious)  
  
I looked up and saw my master, Darth Sidious who was also my beloved Emperor.  
(Master?) I asked. (Is it really you?)  
  
My late master looked me in the eye. (Yes.)  
  
(What are you doing here? Am I dead?)  
  
Sidious smiled slightly. (No, you are not.)  
  
Then suddenly I remembered my manners. (What is your bidding, my master?)  
  
(Don't mock Darth Vader.) Sidious scolded. (My 'bidding', as you put it, is this; that you listen to what I have to say.)  
  
Not truly able to help myself, I replied. (As you wish, my master.)  
  
Sidious sighed in frustration, and then began.  
(You and Darth Maul have long since achieved Mastery of the darkside. Now as 'Masters of the Sith', you and Maul must move on with your lives. You have already started to do this; you have a job and are well acquainted with this world's ways. Maul, you may not have noticed, has started becoming lax. You must tell him to learn the ways of this world. Be careful, you must not become caught up in it.  
  
I would have you both continue your current routine of meditation and practice. You both have learned all that I could possibly teach you.  
  
As for your house guest, do try to get along with him for once. He is not a Jedi and not your enemy.  
  
One other thing, you will sing "We Are the Pirates Who Don't do Anything" every day. Yes I mean it. First of all, I like this 'Veggie Tales'. Second, it will be very entertaining to me.  
  
Do you have any questions?)  
  
(Master) I began (How have I become like this? Will I ever get back in my own body?)  
  
(You have only come here because I have called you. It will not happen again unless I have something important to tell you.  
  
You will return to your body when Haldir kisses you in the morning.)  
  
(What?!?!?) I practically screeched in the force.  
  
Sidious laughed at my reaction. (Didn't you know? He's been kissing you every morning for the past six moths.)  
  
(Why?!?)  
  
(Think back to one of your more civilized discussions with him. You were talking about things that you want but might never have.)  
  
Flashback ***** Haldir and I were talking. I think maybe it was because I was too tired to argue or despise anyone that we had a 'civilized' conversation. He had asked me what it was I wanted but might not ever have. "Promise that you will never tell anyone," I demanded.  
  
"Nobody will know your answer except me."  
  
"I don't think anyone will ever kiss me, let alone like me for who I am."  
  
"You don't think anyone will like you? Darth Maul..."  
  
"Darth Maul is my brother," I interrupted. "I meant the other like."  
  
"What?"  
  
I sighed and explained the American language. ******  
  
(Okay. So what?)  
  
(So) my master replied patiently (That is the reason. For being such a pain, I have one more command to you.)  
  
(Yes?)  
  
(When he does kiss you, you are to kiss him back.)  
  
(What?!?!)  
  
(I am your master, you will obey. It is not like I am asking you to kill yourself. Tell Maul all I have said that concerns him, and kiss the elf.)  
  
(Yes, master.) I replied unhappily.  
  
Then the image of the emperor faded and disappeared, leaving my alone to my thoughts.  
  
6:30am  
  
I still don't want to obey the emperor. But I will admit that I want to, sort of. He might be just doing it to get away with something that I didn't know about. Uh-oh. He's moving.  
  
Hey, any of you out there want to take my place?  
  
Didn't think so.  
  
Oh crud.  
  
I felt myself being drawn back into my body. Now I can feel, but what I feel isn't exactly what I wish I was. My master was right, I was being kissed. Drat. Reluctantly, I obeyed my master's command and kissed him back. *Yuck* (A/N: I'm 19 in this story. Yes I think kissing is disgusting. I've never had a boyfriend or been kissed.) Haldir abruptly stopped kissing me and pulled back. We stared at each other silently for what seemed an eternity before he spoke. "You are well?"  
  
"As well as I normally am. Why did you kiss me?"  
  
"Why did you kiss me back?" He countered.  
  
"Because my master commanded it," I replied, "I doubt you can say the same."  
  
"No, I can't."  
  
"How about answering my question?"  
  
Haldir didn't say anything and left the room.  
  
7:30am  
  
Maul came to make sure that I was back and I delivered the message Master Sidious gave to me. He took it pretty well, except for the fact that I started to sing the mentioned song. "We are the pirates who don't to anything. We just stay at home and lie around..."  
  
Maul fled the room at this time so I sang louder and followed him. Then I had breakfast.  
  
10:00 am  
  
I went to church, as was customary for me on a Sunday.  
  
1:30 pm  
  
I get home from church to find Maul working on his swoop. "Hey Maul." Maul grunted and went back to what he was doing.  
  
The elf was nowhere in sight. But I am ok with that. I don't want to talk to him about this morning anyway. I got inside and found Zsinj out of his cage...again. "Get back in your cage!" I yelled.  
  
"Make me!"  
  
Stubborn stupa peedunkee sleemo of an Imperial War Lord! I force dragged him back to his cage and made sure I used a lock on the door.  
  
After this was accomplished, I heard a voice behind me. "Why do you insist on locking Zsinj up in a cage?"  
  
"Because last time I let him wander free he almost burnt down the building and wasn't even apologetic about it."  
  
I got away from Haldir and went to my room and locked the door, so I could read Fan fictions online, undisturbed.  
  
3:30 pm  
  
I got a stiff neck and stopped using the computer for the moment. There was a knock on the door. "Go away." I automatically replied.  
  
"No," came Haldir's voice.  
  
"Too bad, I'm not going to let you in." I replied.  
  
"Darth Warious, we need to talk right now!"  
  
"No we don't. We don't wants to talk to him do we precious?" I said doing my Gollum impression.  
  
"Warious you are being impossible! Now open this door or I'll get in another way."  
  
"There is no other way you nasty elf!" I yelled through the door.  
  
"You have a window."  
  
"It's two stories up with no ledge that you can use."  
  
"Why should that stop me?"  
  
But before I could answer I discovered that he was already in the room. "How, in Kessel's blood-stained name, did you get in here?"  
  
"I borrowed the key Darth Maul had." He said shutting the door.  
  
"I'm still not talking with you," I replied stubbornly.  
  
Sighing, Haldir sat down on the bed.  
  
I went back to the computer.  
  
Silence  
  
4:50 pm  
  
We still haven't said anything...yet.  
  
6:00 pm  
  
Went down stairs and ate dinner then went back to my room. Still not talking to the elf. I decided to read one of my many Star Wars novels.  
  
8:45 pm  
  
Yeah he came back into my room again. No I'm not talking to him.  
  
9:45 pm  
  
I went to bed. Still not talking to him.  
  
**************** A/N: Yes I am mean. Any ideas? Please review. 


	5. day 5

A/N: Traditional disclaimer. Warning that there is some slight 'romance' scenes.  
  
*************  
  
Day 5 Monday  
  
I'm having a dream.  
  
The first thing I can remember is being Larry Boy's new sidekick. (A/N: Larry Boy is Veggie Tales for those of you who didn't know.) We were searching for the new threat to Bumblyburg. I can't remember what it was now, but it was big and evil. I'm not talking typical Sith 'evil'. This is full blown would-even-make-a-Sith-pee-his-pants evil. All of a sudden Larry Boy and Bumblyburg were no longer there. I was in a place that resembled the inside of a human body: Very dark red and wet inside. The above mentioned creature had me in its claws and was bringing me up to its eyelevel. Its eyes blazed with fire and resembled a depiction of Sauron I once saw. Then, after it looked me over, through me into its mouth and as it was about to clamp down with its massive teeth I...  
  
3:45am  
  
My eyes flew open as I tried not to gasp. I looked to see what I was clinging to. I'll bet you can guess. He's become predictable enough.  
  
I was clinging to Haldir's body and even though I registered this I didn't let go of him, I was too freaked from that dream to let go. He had one arm around me keeping me to him even if I had let go.  
  
He said something I couldn't understand. At my confused expression he turned on his side to face me. "Is something wrong?"  
  
I know this sounds pathetically girly but, I shuddered and clung tighter, burring my face into his chest. Then noticed he wasn't wearing a shirt. Fascinating to see someone's upper body with out on giant tattoo on it *coughmaulcough*  
  
"Could you please loosen your grip?" Haldir asked with probably more patience than I would have had.  
  
I shook my still buried face 'no' but lessened my grip anyway.  
  
"Will you tell me why you have latched yourself onto me at this time of night?"  
  
"Bad dream," I mumbled.  
  
He waited for me to explain, I sensed. So removing my head from its hiding place, I told him my dream and gave what detail could remember. After I finished telling him my dream, I remembered the horror of that creature and went to hide my face again but Haldir stopped me.  
  
"You will be fine; it was only a dream and it cannot hurt you."  
  
I scoffed and remembered other dreams that I and Darth Maul had that came to nearly kill us, but then none of those dreams were scary. "Oh yes they can," I replied and told him about a dream battle both Maul and I had simultaneously, where we faced off against an old dark Lord of the Sith and both still had the physical scars to prove it.  
  
He seemed to not have a counter for this and lay on his back again.  
  
4:50 am  
  
I finally calmed down and attempted to let go of Haldir, but soon found that I could not. I had thought that he was sleeping but the fact that I was still trying to get away from him seemed to amuse him. "Why do you insist on fighting what you feel?"  
  
"What, in Kessel's name, do you mean?"  
  
"You like me. First you kiss me instead of trying to kill me like you promised. Next you feel free to cling to me after you wake up from a 'bad dream' in the middle of the night. Then you continue to hold on to me as you try to calm down. Will you not admit that you like me?"  
  
"Haldir, I really need to change my position if I'm ever going to get back to sleep. I'm not going to admit to anything that my cause me pain in the future and finally I'm going to be very cranky with you in the morning if I don't get sleep now."  
  
Reluctantly, he let me go and I turned on my side away from him. As soon as I closed my eyes I felt his arm circle around my waist. 'Whatever' I thought and went right to sleep.  
  
7:30 am  
  
"Warious," I heard a voice call, "time to wake up." I turned on my back, about to reply when Haldir kissed me.  
  
"That is disgusting," I stated when he stopped. Then brought his head back down to mine and kissed him.  
  
"If kissing is so horrible for you why did you kiss me?" Haldir countered then kissed me again.  
  
"That was a total movie scene. Like James Bond or something." I thought out loud. "Kissing feels better than it looks I guess."  
  
We were about to kiss again when a voice interrupted us.  
  
"Warious, what are you doing with Haldir?"  
  
I pushed Haldir away from me and rolled onto the floor before replying. "Nothing Maul, nothing important."  
  
Maul gave each of us a suspicious glance before leaving.  
  
After Maul had got downstairs I said, "Well, um, I'm gonna have breakfast," and attempted my escape but Haldir caught me by my arm and pulled me to him.  
  
"Not yet," He said then kissed me,*again*.  
  
"Don't come between me and breakfast you koochoo elf."  
  
9:30 am  
  
Maul and I finished our sithly activities and I began my ever popular song...  
  
"We are the pirates who don't do anything..." ect.  
  
Then I went inside to read and write fanfiction all day as I didn't have to work on a holiday.  
  
2:30 pm  
  
Yeah I'm still on... I'm reading this funny fan fiction from one of my all time favorite authors, 'Elf with a Lightsaber' called 'Why Frodo Shouldn't have touched the mirror' (A/N: *Using the Darkside* You *shall* read that story and review) Anyway I was writing a review of my own when Haldir wandered over to me at the computer and asked "Darth Celeborn?"  
  
I explained the story but when I started laughing about the Darth Celeborn part. I saw the evil glare I was getting from him and I ran away as fast as I could.  
  
Haldir tackled me in the living room onto a couch, and we ended up in a wrong position.  
  
"Why did you do that for?" I demanded looking up at him.  
  
"As an excuse to get you in this position."  
  
"Maul!" I yelled.  
  
"I'm finishing your review...What do you want?"  
  
"Get this pervert off of me!"  
  
Maul grumbled something and came over to behold the disturbing scene and proceeded to point and laugh at me.  
  
"What in Kessel's name is so funny?!?"  
  
"The position you two are in. First this morning and now."  
  
Maul left, still snickering.  
  
4:45 pm  
  
Haldir finally decided to get off me so I could make dinner.  
  
I looked in the freezer and saw kielbasa. I decided to make that for dinner.  
  
7:30 pm  
  
Dinner was eaten with relatively few complaints. Zsinj most certainly didn't complain or he'd get the cage again instead of a padded room in the cellar. Yes I am evil.  
  
9:30 pm  
  
I headed to bed.  
  
******* A/N: Good? Bad? Indifferent? What ever you think please review.  
  
Next episode has a trip to the galaxy far far away. 


	6. day 6

A/N: Same old disclaimer. Blah blah blah.  
  
( ) means speaking through the force.  
  
~ ~ means speaking in Ewok.  
  
******  
  
Day 6  
  
I was dreaming again...this time I felt a disturbance in the force and faced off against a Rancor. I like Rancor dreams; they are recognizable and easy to deal with.  
  
7:00 am ?  
  
I woke up to the sounds of strange yet familiar voices singing. Looking up and around me, I saw that I was not in my room. It looked like a one room tree house...this was vaguely familiar.  
  
I noticed that Haldir was not with me as he had been last night. Yes something is very strange.  
  
I heard someone speaking in...that sounds like...yes it is! Someone was speaking Ewok! I fortunately am fluent in this language, thanks to having a mission here for three years at age 9.  
  
I was trained by Emperor Palpatine at a very young age. The empire had just been completed and Darth Sidious saw fit to train a young apprentice in case Lord Vader failed him.  
  
I was that apprentice.  
  
My master sent me to the forest moon of Endor as part of my survival skills training. I made friends with the Great Tree Clan of Ewoks and was adopted into their tribe.  
  
You are probably wondering, why is Darth Maul here?  
  
At age 15, as the second Death Star was being built, Sidious sent me to the farthest reaches of the galaxy into the unknown regions.  
  
I crash landed on Earth and found an abandoned home in the forest.  
  
Three months after, I was meditating and felt a disturbance in the force. With that I knew that my master had died. But at that very moment, Darth Maul appeared in front of me.  
  
Somehow we both decided to stick together; for now we were the only two Sith in the universe.  
  
Anyway I went out the door of my room and beheld the sight of the Great Tree Clan.  
  
Darth Maul was talking with the tribe leader, whose name I can't remember, as other Ewoks gazed in awe at something.  
  
I went over to the group to see what everyone was staring at.  
  
They were poking at a large man tied to a Ewok style spit. It was Zsinj.  
  
Zsinj saw me and said, "What are they doing to me?"  
  
"Isn't it obvious?" I said trying to look bored, "you are going to be eaten."  
  
Zsinj started yelling for me or someone to help him.  
  
Sigh. Why do I have to have a guilty conscious?  
  
I explained to the Ewoks that Zsinj was not food and to let him go but keep an eye on him.  
  
After Zsinj was untied, I went in search of the only person I hadn't seen...Haldir.  
  
2 hours later... I think.  
  
I am really beginning to wish that I wore a chronometer.  
  
No sign of Haldir anywhere.  
  
I decided to ask the Ewok shaman Sunee Paamuk, my adopted Ewok brother, if he had seen him. ~No I haven't seen that one since this morning Dutak Hutar.~ (My Ewok name is Dutak Hutar.)  
  
~Where is father?~ I asked him.  
  
Sunee looked down and didn't say any thing.  
  
~Sirut is gone now isn't he?~  
  
Sunee nodded.  
  
~I'm sorry fruk (brother).~ (A/N: Pronounced like Fruit with a K instead of a T.)  
  
Sunee looked up at me and said, ~Mother died not long after you left and Reh Fulu (our sister) has been mated by one from the Rising Sun Clan.~  
  
~And what about you Sunee?~  
  
~I am still to busy as the tribe's shaman to find a mate, Dutak.~  
  
Sunee and I talked of what had happened after I went back to Coruscant.  
  
About noon time...  
  
I still haven't seen Haldir anywhere.  
  
Maul and I ate with the chief, Longee Yubnub. Yes I finally remembered his name.  
  
Zsinj is being watched by one of the warriors of the tribe.  
  
I asked Chief Yubnub if he had seen Haldir.  
  
~The pale golden one?~  
  
~Yeah, something like that.~  
  
~He went with some of our hunters to help find food. He doesn't seem to understand our language but your fruk, Maul, told him what was said to him.~  
  
~You didn't ask if I wanted to help?~ I asked hurt.  
  
"You were sleeping Warious. I couldn't wake you up." Maul said in basic.  
  
"Gee thanks brother."  
  
I left the Chief's home and went out to talk with old friends.  
  
About three hours after noon...  
  
I climbed to one of the uppermost platforms to survey the land I once knew.  
  
There was no change in the northern part of the forest.  
  
To the east I saw a valley that had not been there before. There were ruins of what once might have been a base and landing pads.  
  
To the south I saw a pile of scrap metal that looked like it was once part of an AT-ST.  
  
And finally to the west...a cold wind blew and the sense of a once living presence was felt. A large black tree grew there about a month's journey from here. Despite its distance it was very easy to see.  
  
I stared back in the direction of the dilapidated base in the east, wondering what had happened. But I had a guess that it was once an imperial base.  
  
"Wondering you are." I heard a strange voice behind me.  
  
I turned around and saw a force image of a small troll like creature.  
  
"Yes, I am. I'm wondering who the Kessel are you?"  
  
The troll like creature laughed croakily, "Yoda my name, it is."  
  
"You don't look like a Sith lord to me."  
  
Yoda's look of humor changed to one of seriousness. "Sith lord I am not. Jedi Master Yoda I am."  
  
I rolled my eyes at the creature, "Then why are you even talking to me? Don't you know what I am?"  
  
"Know I do. Sith you are. Talking I am because of one who wishes you were not."  
  
"Who?" I inquired.  
  
The crea...Yoda, ignored my question and said, "The death of your master took place in the sky above us. His spirit calls from the west, searching for a final place of rest no doubt."  
  
"You don't sound very disappointed," I growled.  
  
"Disappointed I am not. Sorry I am not. Irredeemable Sith was he. Redeemable you are."  
  
"I am a Sith. I will not change my self for anyone." I spoke with pride.  
  
"Young, you are. Much to learn, have you. Consequences, there are, to being a Sith," Yoda warned. "Sad, you make him. Afraid of you, he is."  
  
I wanted to cut down the little Jedi where he stood if he were but alive. "Who? Kessel darn it! Who is?"  
  
"Mmm. Tell you I cannot. Know him you do."  
  
And with that the little bugger disappeared.  
  
About and hour before it was time to eat...  
  
I stood there trying to figure out who didn't want me to be a Sith.  
  
I was trying so hard to figure out who it was Yoda spoke about, that I didn't notice someone had joined me up on that lookout spot. Until he spoke, that is.  
  
"Do you like this place?"  
  
"Nice of you to finally stop by," I said sarcastically to the one person I hadn't seen all day. Haldir.  
  
"That does not answer my question," he replied.  
  
"This is my family. This is my home. Of course I like it here," I said not looking at him. "This place is the first home I ever had off of Coruscant."  
  
"Do all...Ewoks live in the trees?" he asked me.  
  
"Yes. All Ewoks live in trees. That is one reason why I like it here."  
  
"Then you would like my home, Lothlórien. We live similarly to the Ewoks."  
  
Silence.  
  
Haldir came and stood next to me and put his arm around my waist. I looked up at him.  
  
Big mistake.  
  
He kissed me.  
  
Worse mistake.  
  
I kissed him back.  
  
Even far worse mistake...putting our hands where they didn't belong.  
  
Then I pulled away from him realizing what I was doing.  
  
Haldir growled and demanded why I stopped.  
  
"Because I am evil. You cannot change that."  
  
"How did you know?"  
  
"A dead little green Jedi told me."  
  
The Ewok dinner cry was sounded.  
  
"It's time for dinner," I said walking away from him.  
  
Then we headed to dinner.  
  
After dinner...  
  
I went back to my tree hut after the story telling was done for the night.  
  
A/N: Endor! I couldn't resist.  
  
Yoda appears courtesy of Elf with a Lightsaber's suggestion. To EwaL: Thanks for the ideas! 


	7. day 7

A/N: Same stupid disclaimer.  
  
****  
  
Day 7  
  
I woke up wondering where I was. Then I remembered...Endor.  
  
I felt Haldir's arm around my middle, holding me possessively.  
  
Turning around I looked up at the elf that had been living with me and Darth Maul for little over two and a half years.  
  
"You awake?" he asked me.  
  
"Do I look awake?"  
  
"Yes," he said slowly, not sure if that was the right answer.  
  
"Then I'm awake."  
  
"You don't like getting up do you?"  
  
"No," I mumbled, knowing he would hear me.  
  
I rolled out of bed and headed for breakfast.  
  
A little while later...  
  
~There is a matter all Clans of this place would speak to you about.~ Chief Yubnub said after breakfast.  
  
~Yes?~  
  
~You have seen the black tree that grows in the west. Have you felt the bad magic from it?~  
  
~The darkside emanates from that place, yes I have felt it great Chief.~  
  
~You once said you were knowledgeable in this kind of matter, is it true now?~  
  
~I am fully trained in understanding it now.~ I replied beginning to suspect that the Chief was about to ask me to do something.  
  
~We would like you to cleanse the place if you are able.~  
  
~Anything for the good of the tribe.~ I said, ~But it is almost a whole month's journey from here.~  
  
~We have prepared seven Hawk-bat gliders for you if you require companions, but we were not sure.~  
  
I turned to look at Haldir, who was clueless as to what was being said. I quickly summarized what had been said and turned back to Chief Yubnub.  
  
~Do I get to chose my companions or do you have someone in mind?~ I asked.  
  
~The only one you must take with you is Sunee Paamuk and Luka Siz.~  
  
Luka Siz was a shetai (warrior) who I had been trained with. He was a good friend.  
  
~Then I shall also take Haldir and fruk Maul with me also if they will come.~ I replied.  
  
~Maul has already agreed to come with you. You may have to talk to the other.~  
  
Turning back to Haldir I explained to him what the chief asked.  
  
"I will go with you to make sure you stay out of trouble."  
  
"Gee thanks." I replied sarcastically.  
  
I told the chief what he said slightly altering the words.  
  
~Good. You may leave now. On the Hawk-bats it will take you a half sun journey to get there. You may have to walk back.~  
  
~As you wish great Chief.~ I replied bowing.  
  
At the launching platform...  
  
"Are you sure about this?" Haldir asked eyeing one of the Hawk-bat gliders modified for our larger selves. We're not Ewok sized you know.  
  
"Perfectly sure. They are well built and easy to control. When we need to land, I'll explain how."  
  
Needless to say, Haldir didn't look convinced.  
  
Maul came over and laughed at the elf's uneasiness.  
  
Ignoring him I tried my best to not look like a freak with a crazy grin. Luka took care of that for me.  
  
After a few hours in the air...  
  
Haldir doesn't look so freaked now. In fact he seems to be enjoying it.  
  
I have always loved gliding and did it often when I was first here.  
  
Maul was in a meditative state that told me he was bored.  
  
Sunee and Luka flew up and down having a blast behaving like two theesa (children).  
  
I sang "Pirates who don't do anything".  
  
After I finished, I asked Haldir wanted to learn Ewok. He agreed and I started teaching him.  
  
Another few hours...  
  
We have landed in a field near the Black tree and are now walking towards it.  
  
I can feel the darkside's power strongly now and I was soaking it up as was Maul. Taking the dark force inside of me, I started draining the tree of its power. Maul followed suit and drew the force into his body, making it merge with the force that was already flowing in him.  
  
Maul and I were the only ones to approach the tree.  
  
I felt myself become stronger and more powerful with each breath I took. I allowed the force building inside of me to flow into the force that I contained within my body.  
  
Another hour later...  
  
It's dark.  
  
Maul and I have taken all of the force out of the tree, and now head for the small encampment made while we did our job.  
  
Sunee came forward. ~Is it finished?~  
  
~Yes,~ I replied. ~Bless the tree.~  
  
Sunee nodded and went to do what he needed.  
  
Sitting down at the small fire that had also been built I sighed, feeling full.  
  
"Take out your saber's crystals," Maul said handing me my saber.  
  
Carefully, I removed the two crystals from my saber.  
  
"Now pour the force you collected, into the crystals. This will make our sabers stronger."  
  
Haldir watched us from the other side of the fire where Luka cooked Treebark lizard for dinner.  
  
I finished and replaced the crystals back into the saber. Sunee came back and helped Luka finish cooking.  
  
Dinner was served and we ate.  
  
After dinner...  
  
I got up and went to look at the tree.  
  
I felt living force in it and relaxed. I looked up at it in the darkness, wondering if it would still be back in the morning.  
  
"Whatever it was you did, it worked." I heard Haldir say from behind me.  
  
"Yes it did. There is no more of the darkside in this tree, only the living force."  
  
"You did something that wasn't Sith?"  
  
I sighed, "I only do so for nature, not for people."  
  
"Why is that?" He asked wrapping his arms around me.  
  
"You ever watch the news?"  
  
"Sometimes."  
  
"Those things are what happen in our world every day. It grows worse and worse every passing day. I can only seem to tolerate living in it because of being a Sith."  
  
"Oh."  
  
A little while later...  
  
I curled up at the tree's base and fell asleep.  
  
A/N; Endor. The forest moon. How was this chapter? 


	8. day 8

Disclaimer: same as always.  
  
Any strange words in this story are spelled exactly the way they are meant to.  
  
********  
  
Day 8  
  
I woke up at the base of the Great Tree. Haldir was already up and looking around. Then a thought occurred to me...  
  
"Why are they called tooth brushes?"  
  
"What?" Haldir asked looking a bit confused.  
  
"Why are they called toothbrushes?" I repeated my question. "They brush your all of your teeth; and tooth is singular. So why aren't they called Teethbrushes?"  
  
"I haven't the slightest idea of what you're talking about," Haldir replied.  
  
"I'll go ask Darth Maul," I sighed, then got up to find the little camp.  
  
Once there...  
  
"Hey Maul?"  
  
"What?"  
  
"You're stuck with it!"  
  
Maul groaned, "Not this again."  
  
"That and why are they called toothbrushes?"  
  
Maul had the same blank look that Haldir had earlier.  
  
"What on Kessel are you talking about Peedunkee?"  
  
So I explained to him what I had told Haldir earlier.  
  
"Why in Kessel's name do you care? It's just what they call it!"  
  
"Who is they?" I asked.  
  
Maul growled and lunged at me, lightsaber in hand.  
  
I yelped and ran away from the angry Sith Lord.  
  
Needless to say (co-A/N H: Then why are you saying it? A/N: Shut up and let me narrate. Anyway...) all the commotion woke up our two Ewok companions.  
  
~What is going on here!~ Luka Siz demanded.  
  
~Maul is mad at me just because I asked a question~ I whined at my old friend, still running from my very mad Sith brother. I risked a look at Maul to see the look of a mad man staring back. Mad, as in, insane.  
  
~Sunee! Help me!~  
  
~No I don't think I will.~ My adopted Ewok brother said leaning against a tree, watching with amusement. ~I was going to lead you on a stray path and leave you there but I like this much better.~  
  
~Why?!?~ I asked still running for my life around the camp.  
  
~Because you used magic on us so we would sleep.~  
  
Ewoks think of anything like sleeping pills are magic. ~It was just a joke!~  
  
Seeing this was going nowhere I turned around and shot lightning into Darth Maul hoping to 'shock' him to his senses.  
  
Maul stopped...for exactly one second then began chasing me around the camp once more.  
  
The two Ewoks jumped in and tackled me to the forest floor. ~Not fair!~ I protested.  
  
Maul came up and threatened me with his lightsaber.  
  
~Alright! Alright! I'm sorry! I won't do it again!~  
  
After much pleading they let me up and broke camp.  
  
A long while later...  
  
We've been walking for hours. I kept out of 'trouble' by teaching Haldir more of the Ewok language. Now I'm getting bored with playing teacher.  
  
"Who is they?" I asked.  
  
"They who?"  
  
"My point exactly."  
  
"Stop doing that!"  
  
"Stop doing what?"  
  
"Stop asking me strange questions!"  
  
"If they say something it is never questioned. When I say something you guys yell at me." I explained.  
  
"What in Eru's name are you talking about?"  
  
"They are too powerful and no one is sure exactly who they are." I continued ignoring him. "It's a conspiracy I tell you. A CONSPIRACY!!!"  
  
Maul, who was ahead of us, turned around and demanded to know what I was yelling about.  
  
"The universal conspiracy of they," I replied.  
  
"You are nuts." Maul replied shaking his head and turned away from me.  
  
I continued to rant about conspiracies in Ewok in order to annoy everyone at the same time.  
  
Many rantings later...  
  
I stopped ranting for now. Mainly because I have been threatened under pain- of-death if I speak again for the next two hours. *sniff* Everyone is against me. *sigh* Oh well.  
  
Luka Siz took up giving Ewok lessons to Haldir. Out of all the Ewoks on all of Endor, Luka is the only one that can speak and understand Basic. He was the one who spent the most time with me and somehow he was able to learn basic. However, Luka prefers to speak in Ewok most of the time. Another thing I had noticed when we were growing up was that it felt like the force was very strong with him. Hm...strong enough that he might...nah.  
  
Another long while later...  
  
I can talk now, but it's time to set up camp again.  
  
Maul went to get fire wood. Luka and Haldir are finding dinner. Sunee is helping me clean the area up so we can sleep on then ground.  
  
When Maul got back with the wood I arranged it and started a fire.  
  
~Hey Everyone! Dutak is going to make dinner for us!~  
  
I groaned. ~This is still punishment for putting you guys to sleep last night isn't it?~  
  
"Chak," Luka confirmed dropping the skinned Treebark lizards into my arms. ~And you cook better than us.~  
  
~Oh sure. Just because I'm a girl everyone automatically thinks I can cook.~  
  
~Stop whining. I know you can cook. My mom taught you how.~  
  
"Oh yeah. But it's still not fair."  
  
So I cooked the lizards for dinner. I still think they were trying to keep my concentration away from conspiracies. Yeah right.  
  
"It's all a conspiracy I tell you. Conspiracy."  
  
But like last time, they ignored me. Poodoo.  
  
A little while later...  
  
Dinner was eaten. It's dark out. It's time for bed.  
  
A/N: this is the last day on Endor. What will happen tomorrow? I don't know...Okay I do. Nevermind.  
  
Thanks:  
  
To Elf with a Lightsaber: Thank you for the conspiracy ideas.  
  
*using the dark side* You WILL read Elf with a Lightsaber's fan fiction AND you WILL REVIEW THEM.  
  
Thank you also to my other sort of faithful reviewer and best friend Perigin the Silver.  
  
And You *Perigin* WILL read and review the above author's stories and review them. 


	9. day 9

A/N: Disclaimer: I do not own the Matrix in addition to the other things mentioned in the story except myself.  
  
***************  
  
Day 9  
  
I woke up in what looked like a dorm room.  
  
"What?" I yelled.  
  
"Ouch. Could you please lower your voice?" Haldir said. "I'm right next to you."  
  
"Sorry H."  
  
"H?"  
  
"Your new nickname."  
  
Haldir sighed and got up. "Where are we?"  
  
"I don't know." Then I realized something. "I CAN'T FEEL THE FORCE!!!!"  
  
Haldir covered his ears. "Please not so loud!!!!"  
  
"Sorry," I whispered.  
  
"Now that you mentioned it," Haldir said, "I can't feel the earth either."  
  
"Let's go outside and see where we are." I suggested heading for the door.  
  
"Wait," Haldir said. He readjusted his quiver. "Ok. Now we can go."  
  
Rolling my eyes I opened the door to see a man on the other side of the door.  
  
He was tall with dark hair and wore sunglasses.  
  
"Who are you?"  
  
"Miss Warious. My name is Agent Smith. Welcome to the matrix."  
  
"The Matrix? I thought that was a movie?"  
  
"No it's not. You are here for a purpose." Mr. Smith said.  
  
"What purpose?" Haldir asked confused, "What is the Matrix?"  
  
"This is the Matrix, Mr. Haldir. Your purpose is to destroy Neo Anderson and his friends." Smith held up a picture. A group of people were gathered around a telephone. "We have brought you here to kill every last one of them."  
  
I took the picture and went into hunting mode. "Where were these people last seen?" I asked.  
  
The agent nodded, there was a flash of light and we were standing on a busy street in downtown New York. "They were last seen here. Watch out for the other agents, and if you have any further questions, I am everywhere." The Agent handed me a gun, then disappeared into a crowd of people.  
  
"That man looked a lot like Lord Elrond." Haldir said to me.  
  
I shook my head. "Let's get started." I said moving down the street.  
  
"Oi! Wait a minute Warious. Why do we have to kill these people? I don't want to kill anyone." Haldir said blocking my path.  
  
"You aren't the one who is going to kill them, Haldir. I am. Pushee Wumpa!" I shoved past the elf and started my search.  
  
12:00 pm  
  
I've been searching for five hours now and haven't found any trace of them. I am beginning to feel sorry for leaving Haldir behind. Maybe I should go look for him...Nah.  
  
Then I saw Neo and a female friend, who was in the photo, cross to my side of the street.  
  
I prepared to shoot them with the gun Agent Smith had given me but then I saw Haldir walking with them.  
  
Do I shoot? I hesitated. Haldir turned his head in my direction and saw me. 'Shit!' I thought. I raised my gun at Neo Anderson and shot, but it was too late. Haldir warned them in time and now the crowd on the street was in a mad panic.  
  
I followed the direction I had seen them go in and down a darkened ally.  
  
There they are! I shot the gun at them trying to avoid my friend. They split up and I followed Neo, firing my weapon at him. Then, when I had him cornered, I felt a sharp pain in my upper firing arm. Then my right leg started hurting immensely. I felt something graze my side. It was an arrow.  
  
I turned to look behind me. Haldir had his bow out and strung. I watched as he knocked an arrow to the string.  
  
I turned back to see where Neo was. He had escaped and I couldn't see him anywhere. I looked back at Haldir. He let the string go and time seemed to slow as the arrow sped towards me. The arrow went through my chest and I stumbled back from the force.  
  
Haldir caught me as I fell, letting his bow clatter to the ground. Our eyes met and dimly I heard him say, "I'm sorry," before everything went black.  
  
**********  
  
A/N: Now why did you go and do that you nasty co author?  
  
Co-A/N H: You wrote that, not me.  
  
Co-A/N M: Review. 


	10. day 10

A/N Haldir: Same old disclaimer.  
  
**********  
  
Day 10  
  
Haldir: I'm telling you what happened today because Warious was still recovering in the Matrix's 'New York' hospital.  
  
Um it says 9:45 am on the clock.  
  
I've never been good at this 'modern technology' thing. I do know enough to type on the computer. Slowly.  
  
You're probably wondering why I shot Warious. Let me explain but first I must begin when Warious and I went our separate ways...  
  
I wandered around the city for some time. I tried to avoid the woman population, after one scantly clad lady pinned me in an ally way and tried to kiss me, and other things that are not appropriate to speak about.  
  
At about late morning I saw the man Warious was to kill, walking with another person who had been in the picture Agent Smith showed us. I approached them and the encounter went something like this...  
  
"Neo Anderson?" I asked.  
  
Neo stopped walking and looked my way. "Who are you?" he asked.  
  
"My name is Haldir. I have something to tell you; it is important."  
  
Neo and his female companion led me to a quiet place.  
  
"What do you have to say, Mr. Haldir?" the woman asked.  
  
I quickly explained what had happened that morning. "And now my friend Warious seems to have lost her mind and is looking for you to kill you."  
  
Neo looked at his friend. "What do you think Trinity?"  
  
Trinity cast a seemingly neutral look in my direction before answering. "He seems to be honest, and you don't have elves walking around in the Matrix. It isn't in the program."  
  
Neo looked at me. "Well Mr. Haldir, we will take your word for it, for now. But if push comes to shove, your friend may die."  
  
My mouth was dry but I managed to say, "I understand."  
  
"Come on; let's go catch up with the others. You may come too if you like." Neo told me.  
  
I followed them out on to the street. At one point after we had crossed our seventh street, saw Warious. The gun Agent Smith had given her was out and pointed at Neo. I called out a warning to him. There was a loud bang, and all the people on the street went into a mad frenzy. Running around and screaming. Neo led us down an ally. I could feel Darth Warious closing in on us. She turned in the ally and started firing at Neo. The ally split and I went the opposite way Neo ran.  
  
I strung my bow, fitted an arrow to the string, aimed and shot Warious' right arm. Quickly I followed up with an arrow in her right leg and caused one to graze her left side.  
  
I was putting another arrow to my bow when she turned and looked at me. It was like looking at a diseased Warg. She looked as a wild ferocious animal. She turned back to see where her target had gone but Neo had dodged into a doorway. She turned back to me and I loosed my string. The arrow sped toward her. It hit her in the chest and she began to fall. I ran to catch her. As I held her our eyes met. "I'm sorry Warious." I told her and then she closed her eyes.  
  
I thought she was going to die. Neo and Trinity helped me take Warious to the hospital. The healers said she would be fine. But I will have to wait and see for myself. They let me stay with her because I said I was her guardian.  
  
Neo and Trinity left leaving me with Warious.  
  
Now here I sit. By her side wishing she would sit up and talk to me. Even if she decided to scream in my ear I would have gladly put up with just to know she was alright.  
  
Instead I am alone with my thoughts. I thought back to when she looked as a Warg. What had come over the normally controlled woman I had known? What was this new side of her that would mercilessly kill someone just because she was told to?  
  
I looked down at Warious. I remembered how we had used to fight when we first met over the most ridiculous things. Like there was this one time when I decided to cook dinner. Unfortunately I did not pay attention to Maul when he said Warious was a particular person when it came to who cooked. I was preparing a stew for some rabbits I had shot that day, and it was almost done cooking to. Warious came home from her job, took one look at the stove and would have beaten me to a pulp. We ate what I made anyway and she seemed to have calmed down after she had eaten.  
  
Then there was that time I saw her eating something and I asked what it was. "No!!! They are my Warheads! You can't have them! They are mine! All mine! Mwahahahaha!" I never bothered her when she was eating Warheads again.  
  
Now that I think about it, those times were funny. Then I remembered how she started opening up to me, how it felt when we kissed, holding her in my arms at night. No I didn't do anything inappropriate with her! How dare you even think that!!! Oh wait. You're not a person, you're a computer. Never mind then.  
  
When the clock said 5:00 pm, Agent Smith appeared.  
  
He looked down at my Warious then up at me.  
  
"Look at what you have done to your friend," he said gesturing towards Warious.  
  
I looked away from him. "She was insane," I replied.  
  
He rounded on me glaring at me. "You did this to her elf." He spat the last word out like a curse. "It is your fault that she lays here. You shot her. You have hurt her. You're the one to blame. If you had not interfered with her job she would be awake and she would not be lying here." He continued circling me as he accused me. I knew he was right.  
  
The Agent finally stopped circling me and looked me in the eye. "You could be back where you both belong if you had just let her do her job." Then the Agent left.  
  
I knelt by Warious' side and absently ran my fingers through her hair. I am overwhelmed by guilt. That is why I refuse to leave her side in this place. I will wait for her to wake up and then I will do whatever she tells me to. Even if she tells me to leave and never come back...  
  
**********  
  
A/N Haldir: Yes, I wrote this chapter. Please review.  
  
I would like to thank Elf with a lightsaber for being a faithful reviewer.  
  
And I would like to thank Lillian for introducing me to Warious in the first place. 


	11. day 11

A/N: Same old disclaimer.  
  
*************  
  
Day 11  
  
Warious:  
  
I've been floating in a black void for an unknown amount of time. The last thing I remember is seeing Haldir shoot me then I heard him saying "Sorry". I thought back to when we first arrived in the Matrix. I remembered feeling detached from myself as I used to be when my Master sent me to kill Alliance members. Yes I killed people. Did I like it? No. Then why did I act the way I did? I don't know. Thoughts swirled around in my head; questions, but never real answers to them, just half answers.  
  
I floated in the black void and then I saw a light. Not like the 'end-of- the-tunnel' kind but a humanoid figure. A lady it looked like. When the person drew near I saw that it was most definitely a Lady. Not only that but she was a radiant being and I sensed from her the same kind of feeling I could sense from Haldir. She was an Elf.  
  
The Lady Elf stopped in front of me and I bowed in respect to her. The lady had long golden hair and wore an elaborate circlet of silver on her brow. Her dress was long and had a regal tone to it. She was beautiful, and yet, terrible to look upon; I felt no fear of her.  
  
"Warious," the Lady spoke in a gentle voice but I could feel the power behind it. "Warious, what has made you this way?"  
  
"I do not know Lady Elf. I have been wondering the same question you ask me and still no answer comes." I said unable to hold her piercing gaze.  
  
I sensed her smile kindly at me but I still did not look up. "You have not yet tamed the animal within you Warious. You have been trained to control yourself in all situations but you still cannot control your inner beast."  
  
"I don't understand what you mean."  
  
"Look into my face Warious." I looked up. "You are not all human Warious. You are a part animal. I can for now help suppress your animal till you seize control of it, but you must ask for my help."  
  
"Ask? I still don't understand what you mean. What do you mean by not all human?" I was feeling confused and frustrated.  
  
"In time you will understand," the Lady replied cryptically.  
  
"You speak as a Jedi!" I accused. "Stop speaking in riddles please."  
  
"I am no, Jedi, as you put it. I am The Lady Galadriel. If you decide to ask my help call my name." And with that she vanished.  
  
'That was weird.' I thought to myself.  
  
Slowly I felt my mind being pulled back into my body.  
  
10:45 am  
  
I opened my eyes and the first thing I saw was Haldir sitting beside me staring at the wall in front of him. Then I noticed the I.V. in my arm. I hate I.Vs.!  
  
"Get this Kessel dammed thing out of my arm!" I yelled, startling Haldir.  
  
He jumped in his chair, a rather funny thing to see, and quickly came closer to me. He took the I.V. out and then kissed me long and hard. I shoved him off and gasped for air.  
  
"Hey stupid! Couldn't you wait until I was sitting up to do that?"  
  
"I'm sorry, it's just that I was so glad that you are awake that I..."  
  
"Ah whatever," I said interrupting Haldir. I sat up.  
  
"May I kiss you now?" he asked.  
  
"No! I want answers! Why did you shoot me?!?"  
  
He kissed me anyway. 'Oh fine' I thought and just let him get it out of his system.  
  
Once he stopped I asked him again.  
  
He looked away from me and to the ground again. I waited. He didn't speak for a few minutes but then he finally answered my question, sort of. "You were out of control. I had to do something."  
  
"Yeah." I said quietly. "About that, I'm sorry for going all weird on you. It's happened before when I was working for my Master. I'm sorry if I hurt you." Oh shoot. Why did I just say that? Never mind for now.  
  
We left the hospital and were walking down the street when suddenly we were in an office of some sort. There we saw Agent Smith. There appeared to be four of him. Yes there was four of him.  
  
"Nice to see you up and about, Miss Warious. You look alive today."  
  
"Not to much of disappointment I hope," I said cheerfully.  
  
"You still have the elf around I see."  
  
"Yes I do. He was only acting on an impulse. Is there any particular reason why we are here?" I asked.  
  
"Yes. We called you here to say that we don't require your services anymore. I thought this was a politer way do this than just letting any old Agent find you. I do hope you understand." The Agent replied.  
  
"So you are going to kill us?" Haldir demanded tensing for a fight.  
  
"No, of course not elf." Agent Smith waved his hand dismissively at Haldir. "We are merely sending your minds back to where your bodies are."  
  
"Where exactly is that?" Haldir asked.  
  
"When you wake up you will find out. Now it is time to send you to your bodies."  
  
The Agent said something in computer language *Yes it is a real language* and then a door appeared in the middle of the room.  
  
"Enter the door to get back."  
  
I strode toward the door, opened it and stepped through and dragged Haldir along with me. All this time he was saying, "I have a bad feeling about this."  
  
***************  
  
A/N: Ha next day is done. Yes that day was boring. I know but where do we end up ? 


	12. day 12

A/N: Same old disclaimer.  
  
I own Luka Siz and Darth Warious  
  
This chapter is dedicated to Éowyn Skywalker; who has been patently waiting for this chapter.  
  
**********  
  
Day 12  
  
7:30 am  
  
I opened my eyes; Haldir was lying next to me. I reached out with my senses and..."Yes!!! I can feel the Force again!" I bounced out of bed and turned to Haldir. "See? They didn't kill us, and now wesa back!" Without waiting for a response I bounced downstairs. Darth Maul was sitting at the Holonet terminal doing something. "Hi brother! Did you miss me?"  
  
Maul turned around in his chair. "Where were you?" he asked slightly sounding perturbed.  
  
"I was in the Matrix!!!!!" I replied jumping up and down. "It was sooooo cool! I got to meet Agent Smith! It was so awesome!"  
  
Maul went back to the Holonet saying, "Whatever."  
  
I looked in the dog crate...it was empty. "Where is Zsinj?" I asked.  
  
Maul shrugged, "Last I knew he was on Endor. We brought someone else back with us instead."  
  
"Who?" I asked warily.  
  
At that moment a pair of small furry arms clamped themselves around my leg. ~Good morning Dutak.~  
  
I looked down. "Luka Siz!" ~How did you get here?~ I rubbed the Ewok's head.  
  
~I don't know. We were on our way back to the Great Tree Clan and then I woke up here. Where did you go? I thought maybe something had happened to you.~ Luka said letting go of my leg.  
  
~I went someplace that you wouldn't be able to understand. But I'm back now. How do you like it here?~ I asked my friend.  
  
"The first thing he said when he got here was 'that you must hate it here.'" Maul interrupted from the other room.  
  
I shook my head. ~Where is the elf being?~ Luka asked me.  
  
~I'm here.~ Came Haldir's reply. In Ewok no less!  
  
~Good, you catch on quick.~ Luka said to Haldir.  
  
"But does anyone care that I can speak Ewok too? No. It's a conspiracy I tell you! A conspiracy!!!!!"  
  
Everyone was now accustomed to my constant saying so they ignored me. So I continued talking about conspiracies for a while until Maul asked Haldir to shut me up. "That's a conspira..." I was in mid rant when that elf kissed me. Well, it did shut me up. But not for long bwahahahahahaha!  
  
I pulled away and ran away from Haldir yelling about conspiracies until I was too tired to continue. Then we all gathered into the living room to watch a movie. But what movie were we going to watch? I won the Rock, Paper, Scissors, game so I chose.  
  
"We are going to watch the Muppet Show!" I announced happily. Maul groaned, Haldir rolled his eyes and Luka looked clueless. "And we are going to watch the one with Mark Hamill!"  
  
So we watched the Muppet show. "Hey!" I yelled two seconds after the theme song ended, "What is Luke Skywalker doing on this? I better tell my friend that her co-author is loose." So after the episode ended I went to report the incident to her.  
  
After that it was time for me to work so I left to go to the library.  
  
5:30pm  
  
I'm soooo glad to be home now. Don't get me wrong, I love the library and my job there...I hate dealing with the loud and rude kids that occasionally come along. Tonight was the worst it had ever been. They were loud, picking out books and leaving them on the floor, tearing up pieces of note book paper and letting it fall on the ground...it was terrible. They finally got kicked out by the head librarian.  
  
So I returned home mentally exhausted, frustrated and in a not-so-nice mood. Maul sensed this right away and warned everyone before I got home.  
  
Haldir had made dinner again without asking me first, but I'll let it slide this time as I was too tired to cook anything anyway. Yes I really am picky about cooking and who does it. That's just the way I am. It is MY kitchen and anything I say is law!  
  
I felt better after eating and was feeling reasonably civil again. Then Maul spoke... "Warious?"  
  
"Yes Maul?" I replied clearing the table.  
  
"Do you want an apprentice?"  
  
I looked at Maul like he was nuts and replied, "I'm not ready for an apprentice yet. Why do you ask?"  
  
I saw Maul glance at Luka Siz. 'Uh-oh' I thought, 'what happened now?'  
  
"Luka is force sensitive enough to be trained."  
  
Luka looked down at the ground uncomfortably.  
  
"What makes you say that Maul?" I asked.  
  
"This afternoon after you left," Maul began, "Luka was trying to get something on the counter up there." He pointed to a relatively high shelf. "And he got it without climbing up. I saw the thing come down to him."  
  
I turned to Luka. "How long have you been able to do this?" I asked.  
  
"It started after you had left us to go back to Coruscant. I remembered watching you do it before and thought that maybe I could. So one day I was trying to get my spear back, I dropped it from the lookout tree, and I got it to come back to me."  
  
Haldir's jaw dropped. "Luka can speak the common tongue?"  
  
Ignoring Haldir temporarily, I reached out with the force to 'touch' Luka. Sure enough Luka was brimming with the force. This was an interesting find. Most 'primitive' life forms can't typically access the force. But then again, Luka can speak Basic when no other Ewok can. Finally I asked, "What else can you do?"  
  
~I can lift objects, I can make other creatures not see me, I can feel when trouble is coming, or mother's sister.~ Luka replied.  
  
I laughed understanding why he added his Mother's sister (Ewok way of saying aunt). She was not the most pleasant of relatives to Luka.  
  
"Amazing. A force sensitive Ewok. This is going to be fun."  
  
Maul looked up at me. "So you'll train him?" He asked hopefully.  
  
"Nope. You get to, it was your discovery my dear brother. You get to train our young Ewok friend."  
  
Maul groaned but didn't argue.  
  
9:30 pm  
  
"Well it's been an interesting day," I said to Haldir.  
  
"Yes it has," he agreed sliding his arms around me. We were in my room and I was about ready for bed. "Warious, I have something to ask you."  
  
I glanced at him, "Haku?" (Huttese for 'what?')  
  
He got down on one knee holding my hand in his and gazing up at me he spoke, "I know this isn't typical of any elf concerning a mortal but; will you, as you say here, marry me?"  
  
Needless to say I was in shook. I was too tired to consider it right now so I yanked the loony elf to his feet and replied, "I'll think about it in the morning." And with that being said I got into bed and fell asleep.  
  
*********  
  
A/N: A force sensitive Ewok and a marriage proposal all in one day? What more could happen?  
  
Please Review  
  
Thank you to Elf with a Lightsaber, for the idea of a force sensitive Ewok.  
  
*Using the force* You will read and review all of Elf with a Lightsaber's work. 


	13. day 13

A/N: Same old disclaimer. I own Warious, Luka Siz, Lillian, Pegasus, and Commander Rogue Dragon.  
  
Please read and review, Elf with a Lightsaber's work after you read and review mine.  
  
**********************  
  
Day 13  
  
7:00 am  
  
I woke to the sound of a loud scream. It wasn't Haldir because the sound came from the outside. It wasn't a Ewok scream, and Maul had been meditating before the sound brought him out of his trance. I looked out the window to see what had been making that noise. I couldn't see anything from my window.  
  
I was about to climb over Haldir to go looking for the noise when he pulled me back down. "Leave it be. It's probably not important," he mumbled. (A/N: Incase you people with sick minds out there haven't figured it out yet, *you know who you are*, I sleep in my clothes.)  
  
I glared at him and rolled him off the bed so I could get out. "I don't care. I'm going to find out what it was. Anything that disturbs my sleep shall be investigated," I retorted getting out of bed. I headed downstairs to find my friend Lillian and Pegasus in our kitchen. (It serves as the dining room and the kitchen.) I looked at them and then looked for Maul. He was muttering in some language and it didn't sound pretty.  
  
"What are you two doing here so early in the morning?" I asked.  
  
"We, we saw Maul..." Pegasus sounded freaked out.  
  
"Maul was meditating and we saw him." Lillian finished for her friend.  
  
"So?" I asked slowly. "Maul meditates, I meditate, what seems to be the problem?"  
  
Maul burst out of the bathroom looking redder than normal, "They saw me doing early morning meditation."  
  
"He wasn't wearing any clothes," Pegasus said looking a tad green and very embarrassed.  
  
"Awww, you poor girls come on lets go watch Lord of the Rings and I promise not to gag when Legolas comes on." I turned to Maul, "Shame on you! Do that meditation inside if you don't want to be seen." I then moved my friends into the living room to watch the movie I promised them.  
  
We got into the living room and were immediately intercepted by a smallish fuzz ball who latched himself on to my legs. ~Good morning Dutak!~ Luka greeted me.  
  
"Hi Luka."  
  
Lillian and Pegasus squealed in delight at seeing the 'adorable Ewok'. After they finished fawning over a very unnerved Luka, Lillian spoke to me. "Hey! We got tickets to see Les Miserables in Boston! (A/N: I don't own this either () We have two extra tickets and we were wondering if you and Haldir wanted to come with us."  
  
"Go where?" The mentioned elf asked.  
  
"To see Les Miserables!" We all said at the same time.  
  
"What is that?" he asked puzzled.  
  
"Do you hear the people sing?" Maul's voice came from the other room, surprisingly good for someone who has only heard all the way through once.  
  
Lillian, not waiting for either of us to say 'Yes', dragged me and Haldir out to the car.  
  
We didn't drive to Boston; instead we took the train after driving down into Massachusetts. Haldir looked nervous at the new form of transportation and nothing Lillian or I could say or do would calm the elf. So there we are at the train station with a elf ready to spazz, when the train arrived. After many shoves and persuasion (co-A/N H: They mean tickled. A/N W: Shut up!), we got Haldir on the train.  
  
After a half hour on the train, Haldir seemed to relax and was now trying to collect what was left of his dignity *which is hard to do when you have Lillian and Pegasus giggling about you*.  
  
We arrived in Boston at about 11:00 am. And then Haldir couldn't stop commenting about the lack of nature and the levels of pollution. We tried to get him to shut up when I threatened to tickle him some more. Since that idea seemed to please him, I threatened to let my friends tickle him instead. This worked as a much better threat.  
  
When we arrived at the theater there was a small line, but I knew from experience that this line was going to grow. We stood there for about ten minutes and the line grew, as I knew it would, to large proportions before they let us in.  
  
It was a nice theater but it was quickly packed by mainly older adults. It seemed Lillian, Pegasus, and I were the only Les Miz fanatics in the entire area right about now. That is until...  
  
I bumped into a person about my size and apologized to her without looking in their direction. I was moving away when I heard the person say, "Warious?"  
  
I turned around. "Hey Commander!" I greeted the missing person of my group. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"That's my line!" Commander laughed. "I'm here for the same reason you are. It's not like they have two musicals at once here."  
  
Lillian and Pegasus caught up with me and immediately noticed who I was talking to. They were happy to see each other and Commander was in a good mood until she noticed my ever present shadow, Haldir. "What is he doing here?"  
  
"Hello to you too, Lady Rogue Dragon," Haldir replied. No, they don't like each other much.  
  
We found our seats which were conveniently placed in the same area. We watched the play with great anticipation. Okay, Lillian, Pegasus, Commander and I watched the play with anticipation. Haldir, on the other hand, was bored.  
  
When the four hour play was finished we headed to a restaurant to eat something before we collapsed from hunger. Okay so we weren't going to collapse from hunger, but we were very hungry. We found a nice place to eat and had a late lunch/early supper.  
  
We had some time on our hands so Lillian decided we would all go sight seeing. We kept Haldir quiet by promising him we would go to the park first. After that we just wandered around Boston trying to avoid the dangerous amount traffic in its streets. About an hour later I felt something was wrong. I couldn't figure out quite what it was so I turned around to ask H if he sensed anything. It was then when I realized what was wrong. Haldir was missing. I told the others and we tried to figure out where to look for him.  
  
We first decided to try the park. He wasn't there. Then we tried to figure out what could have been so interesting to him that he wandered off. None of us could figure it out so we retraced our steps.  
  
Another hour later Commander suggested to check the docks. "Why would he be there?" Pegasus asked.  
  
"Because all elves love the sea." Commander pointed out several references to Tolkien's works. Haldir was from Middle Earth. It was possible.  
  
We ran for the docks as fast as we could and hoped he didn't run into any trouble. Hey, this is Boston, who knows what you'll find here. You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy anywhere else in New England.  
  
We eventually found him surrounded by a group of young adults in gang colors. It looked like they were threatening to shove him into the water. My friends hung back as I stepped foward to confront the gang. They knew to stay out of my way when it came to my using the force.  
  
I called the force into a concentrated and visible form that would take on the appearance of a rare monster. An Kyrat Dragon of Tatooine. This for all you un-Sith-knowledgeable people is called a battle illusion. A very rare ability and one of the reasons that the Jedi don't like the Sith. A battle illusion can harm people physically.  
  
One by one, each member of the gang turned and saw my fearsome creation and ran away. Haldir saw it too and looked ready to fight it, but then he saw me standing there behind the creature.  
  
Once all the gang members left and were out of sight, I released the force and the Kyrat Dragon disappeared. "The police are never around when you really need them are they," I commented to Haldir. He rolled his eyes at me and approached me.  
  
"You used the dark side for that, didn't you?" Haldir said.  
  
"Who cares? Let's go home." And with that we headed for the train station, boarded the train, and headed home.  
  
Haldir and I got home at about 7:30pm.  
  
Luka was waiting for us at the door. He was all excited and eagerly described his discoveries of earth and its technology. Then he continued talking to us by describing his first lesson in using the force.  
  
I thought it was funny the way Luka elaborately described his day and lesson. It was like listening to a kid who discovered, what he would consider, a new and different world filled with new wonders to be found.  
  
Maul walked into the room while Luka was describing his day and gave me an 'I had a very long day' look.  
  
It was about 9 o'clock when my friend finished talking, and I decided to go to bed.  
  
Upstairs, Haldir asked me if I had an answer for him.  
  
"What answer?"  
  
"I asked you to be my life mate."  
  
"Oh that. I'm still thinking. Ask me again in a month." I told him.  
  
*********************  
  
A/N: Tomorrow I give Luka lessons. 


	14. day 14

Same old disclaimer.  
  
*******  
  
Day 14  
  
7:00am  
  
'I seem to be waking up to a whole lot of things lately,' I thought feeling the bed bounce under me as I heard delighted giggling. 'First I wake up being kissed, then I find myself on Endor, next in the Matrix, now to a bouncing Ewok.'  
  
I cracked open one eye to watch Luka Siz jumping on my bed like a two-year- old. It was amusing to watch. Then I finally started feeling motion sick from the bouncing of Maul's apprentice. "Luka!" ~Stop bouncing on my bed please.~  
  
"Chak Dutak," Luka replied and got off of my bed after one last bounce.  
  
I groaned and rolled off my bed, landing on the floor with a loud 'thunk'. Luka looked at me suspiciously and asked, ~You aren't getting sick too, are you?~  
  
"Why in Kessel's bloody name would I be sick?"  
  
Haldir bolted into my room. "Maul is very sick Warious. I've never seen a ailment like this before!"  
  
"What color is Maul?" I asked.  
  
~Funny you should ask that 'cause Maul seems to have 'Dark-moon' syndrome.~  
  
Dark-moon syndrome is a common Ewok sickness and more like their version of a cold. In most species it is akin to the flu. I seem to be immune to it though. Sighing I got up and went to look at my ailing brother.  
  
I checked on Maul, he was an interesting shade of purple where he was normally red. (Dark-Moon syndrome turns non-furry humanoids blue.) He was going to be fine; providing he rested for the day. It was just about then that I realized I would have to train Luka for today. I've never trained anyone in my entire life. I didn't think I was quite ready for the experience but now I had no real choice.  
  
9:00am  
  
I am making Luka go through with meditation and he seemed to be okay with it...for five minutes.  
  
~Dutak? Are we done yet?~  
  
~No Luka, keep meditating.~  
  
Two minutes later...  
  
~Are we done yet?~  
  
~No.~  
  
Mere seconds later...  
  
~Now?~  
  
I am feeling that this is going to be a very long day.  
  
9:30am  
  
We made it, more or less, through meditation. Yahoo. Sarcasm.  
  
I then went over what Maul had taught Luka yesterday, and suddenly realized that it really was going to be a very long day.  
  
~Um, I don't really remember what Maul taught me.~  
  
"WHAT?!?"  
  
Haldir, in a tree safely 'out of my reach', laughed at me. I glared at my companion which made him laugh all the more. I reached out with the force and violently shook the tree Haldir was in till he fell out.  
  
Turning back to Luka I heard a small strangled 'Ow' before continuing, "Let's start from the beginning then.  
  
So I started with the simple force abilities like standing on one's heads and lifting several rocks that are as big as a box. (A/N: Sorry. Too much Weird Al)  
  
I ran Luka through the basic force skills; like lifting objects, moving things with the force and more meditation.  
  
~More of that?~ Luka whined when I told him to meditate again.  
  
"Yes 'more of that'. You need to learn this."  
  
~Why?~  
  
I sighed, feeling frustrated. "Because I am your temporary master and I say that you must learn it."  
  
~You have no idea do you?~  
  
"The purpose is to learn how to obey your master even if he or she asks you to do something that seems silly. That is why. Now meditate!" I told my Ewok apprentice.  
  
Luka grumbled and attempted to meditate.  
  
It was quiet for at least five minutes before Haldir finally groaned from his awkward position on the ground and got up. (He had landed hard and on his head so he was lying with his head and neck on the ground and the other half of his body was draped over a low branch.) He came over to me and asked, "Why did you do that?"  
  
"You laughed. I am trying to do something that I really stink at, and your laughing at me does not help." I hissed at him so Luka wouldn't be disturbed. I looked over at my temporary apprentice and saw that he had indeed stopped meditating and was watching us expectantly. "Meditate!" I ordered the Ewok. Quickly Luka went back to 'meditating'.  
  
Haldir slung an arm around my shoulder and turned me to face him.  
  
"What?" I asked him when he didn't say anything.  
  
"You owe me after that stunt you pulled with the tree."  
  
"Oh yes...I'm sorry. But don't you ever laugh at me again when I am trying to do something I normally stink at, please."  
  
Haldir slid his other arm around my waist and secured the one around my shoulders making it a bit hard to get away. "I accept your apology."  
  
"Let me go please. Luka is right there and," I directed my next words at Luka, "HE ISN"T MEDITATING!"  
  
Haldir winced. Oh shoot, I forgot about his ears.  
  
"I'm sorry." I said, lowering my voice.  
  
Haldir growled and then kissed me. I tried to pull away but found that he had strategically placed his arms around me. Haldir kissed me more insistently and I found myself responding. I wrapped my arms around him; one going around his back and the other sliding up to feel his long, soft, hair. I lost myself in his kiss and felt like never stopping.  
  
We had been kissing for at least a few minutes before I felt a tug on my pants, at the knee. I remembered that I was supposed to be training Luka and sighed. I broke the kiss and said, "I need to do my sithly duties now, Haldir."  
  
"Do you have to?" He asked disappointed.  
  
I nodded, not really wanting to let go. Haldir sighed and let go of me but then caught my arm. I turned to look at him.  
  
"I love you," he said, then kissed me quickly and let go of my arm.  
  
I turned back to Luka, who was looking expectantly at me. ~You two are life mates?~ the force sensitive Ewok asked.  
  
~He wants to be my life mate.~  
  
~Then why are you two not life mates?~  
  
~We need to be married first Luka Siz. Now lets try moving trees.~  
  
1:00 pm  
  
I finally finished today's training session with Luka with out anymore distractions. Yes! Now we are inside eating lunch. I checked on Maul to see how he was doing. He is more red than purple now so that means the Ewokian cold is going away.  
  
After lunch I went to my job at the library.  
  
5:30pm  
  
It was another wonderfully boring day at the library for me. But I am okay with that. I prefer not having to deal with the teens that wreak havoc in a library.  
  
I got home to find dinner ready. I scolded Haldir for not asking me first and then thanked him for making dinner for me. He looked a little confused at first because of my method of thanking him, but then kissed me after it registered.  
  
I pulled away before we got carried away and sat down to eat with a bouncy Ewok and a slightly sick Darth Maul.  
  
9:30pm  
  
I'm upstairs on the computer and talking to my friends on the Middle-earth Message board. Haldir came in and wrapped his arms around me. I looked up at him, "Yes? What do you want?"  
  
"To marry you." He replied and then kissed me.  
  
"What if I say 'yes'?" I asked him when he stopped.  
  
"Then you will make me a very happy Elf."  
  
I kissed Haldir full on the mouth and then said, "I want to make you a happy elf."  
  
"Does this mean...?"  
  
"It means 'yes'. I will marry you." I replied. I got out of the chair and looked into his eyes. We were about to kiss when loud yelling interrupted us. I sighed and went to the top of the stairs. "KEEP IT DOWN!"  
  
I came back into my room and asked Haldir why we always get interrupted.  
  
"I have no idea. Let's get some sleep now." So we went to bed.  
  
**********  
  
A/N: Review me! 


	15. day15

A/N: I do not own any thing in the fic except the situations, Darth Warious, and Luka Siz.  
  
Thank you to my most faithful reviewer, Éowyn Skywalker and Lillian.  
  
Day 15  
  
7:30am  
  
I wake to the soft, warm, inviting kisses of Haldir of Lothlórien, who is to be my husband. Sleepily, my mind wonders if I will be happy this way, with an elf for a husband, with an immortal...  
  
"Good morning, Warious."  
  
Moan. "No talking just kiss," I mumbled.  
  
Thankfully Haldir complied, as I was not awake enough to say or do much else. Slowly I woke up and started responding more thoroughly to Haldir's kisses...until a small ball of fur bounced up on to the bed and loudly proclaimed in Ewok, I knew it! Luka exclaimed proudly, You two are life- mates!  
  
I decided to ignore Darth Maul's new apprentice and snaked my arm around the back of Haldir's neck to prevent him from pulling away.  
  
"What are you two doing!?!" My brother's Maul enraged voice exclaimed.  
  
Haldir, turned his head to glare at my Sith brother, then resumed kissing me.  
  
(You two are absolutely disgusting.) Maul told me though the force. (I take it you have accepted?)  
  
"Mmmmmm," I 'said' in response, half to Maul's question and half to the wondrous elf I pledged myself to.  
  
I sensed Maul's satisfaction of my answer. (Why do you care?) I asked.  
  
(Now you can have Sith instead of finding them.) Maul snickered at me.  
  
I sensed Maul turning to leave and said through the force, (Take your apprentice with you.)  
  
8:30am  
  
I ate breakfast feeling quite blissful. Strange for a Sith...a killer...like me. Don't get me wrong, I don't like killing people, but I have done it. Somehow the time I spent being trained by the emperor had made me accustomed to being heartless towards most sentient creatures. But then I met Haldir...  
  
Even when I had first met him, I couldn't find it in me to stay distant and oblivious to him. That was probably the main reason I had constantly argued with him. And, so suddenly, I now find myself with an answer to the loneliness that I had never confessed to having.  
  
"What are you thinking about Warious?" I heard Haldir's voice say, bringing me back to reality.  
  
"You," I replied simply turning to look at him.  
  
"What about me?" he grinned.  
  
"How different you make me feel."  
  
"Oh? And how do I make you 'feel different'?" he asked.  
  
"I feel, like being nice to you," I replied with an evil grin.  
  
Haldir looked suspiciously at me for a few minutes and actually thought I was going to do something bad instead. That is, until I started laughing. Haldir rolled his eyes at me and kissed me. "You are a pain Warious." He told me after breaking away.  
  
I grinned and replied, "I know."  
  
10:00am  
  
Haldir and I watching Maul attempt to teach Luka how to meditate. It wasn't going well.  
  
"I said breath evenly not hyperventilate!"  
  
Excuse me!  
  
"You are not excused, you little brat of an Ewok! You will breathe evenly and you will stay here until you get it right, even if it takes all night!"  
  
I'm trying!  
  
At this point I cut in, Try not. Do or do not. There is no try.  
  
Maul glared at me and said, "Don't teach him that filthy Jedi logic!"  
  
"Our master did say something similar to those Jedi words you know, brother. 'You do not have permission to try, only to DO and succeed'." I said in perfect imitation of our late master, Sidious.  
  
Maul scowled at me before turning back to his apprentice. I tried really hard not to laugh. I really did...I couldn't help it.  
  
Maul whirled around and sent electric-blue force lightning streaking my way. I countered with my own dark purple lightning. Our attacks met and resulted in a giant shock wave, knocking everyone to the ground.  
  
I lay there dazed and then attempted to regain my ability to stand. That failing I looked around to see if every one was alright. Luka was rolling over to push himself up, Maul was swearing in the force. I saw Haldir next to me, but he seemed faint, ghost-like.  
  
I could feel a disturbance in the force growing stronger around Haldir and somehow I knew what was happening. "Don't H. Please don't."  
  
He shook his head, "The Lady is calling for me Warious. I must go."  
  
And then...He vanished.  
  
Epilogue  
  
Maul and Luka didn't seem to remember anything about Haldir or even his being there. I felt sad and more alone then I ever had before in my life.  
  
New Entry: Darth Maul:  
  
And so Warious turned to shadow ways and fell into a dark despair. She became a threat even to her fellow Sith. They sent her away, into the world.  
  
She wandered into the wild and stayed there to practice the forbidden ways of the Sith, so they say. The darkness consumed her and she was human no more.  
  
A/N: Yes this is the end. There is going to be a sequel. It will not be quite so random though.  
  
Please Review. 


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